This message should be read from top to bottom.
Each line should be read from left to right. Some blanks lines may be present.
glitchsys.com takes no responsibility for any damage or injury caused by reading this message
in any other way. I accept no responsibility for any results of blank lines,
misspellings or poor grammar, or any naughty words that cause this material to
be blocked by your web server. I have put all this in at the start because I
cant afford any legal advice. In fact, I take no responsibility for anything,
even for the content, and certainly not for any interpretation thereof.
This is not necessarily true however, so no part of this disclaimer should be
interpreted as legal or other advice.
The following are the terms and conditions for use of glitchsys.com domain for your use and enjoyment (each feature individually and collectively referred to as the "Service").
This Service is provided to individuals who are at least 18 years old or minors.
IMPORTANT: BY VISITING OR 'CLICKING' ON ANY PART OF MY PAGES OR WHATEVER IT'S CALLED IN YOUR PARTICULAR BROWSER YOU ARE STATING THAT YOU MIGHT ACTUALLY HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOUR AND THAT YOU AGREE TO BE BOUND BY ALL OF THESE TERMS AND CONDITIONS OF THE SERVICE OR OTHER REQUIREMENTS DEEMED APPROPRIATE AS NECESSARY.
You are entirely responsible for maintaining your sense of humour. Keep away from power lines. Do not stand in stairwells. Don't get burned by firewall.
There is no warranty expressed or implied within the Service that purports to claim that you will find any of the material within The Service as funny or amusing.
No part may be reproduced, transmitted, transcribed, stored in a retrieval system, or translated into any language or computer programme, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, optical, chemical, manual, sexual, telepathic, or otherwise unless it is delivered with the right timing.
Avoid direct sunlight or any illegal medication while taking The Service. Furthermore, you agree to notify glitchsys.com iediately of any unauthorised use of your sense of humour or any indication of a life-threatening splitting of sides, which will then be promptly be ignored.
The Service warps space and time in its vicinity. Any use of this Service, in any manner whatsoever, will increase the amount of disorder in the universe. Some quantum physics theories even suggest that when the consumer ("the reader") is not directly observing this Service, it may cease to exist or will exist only in a vague and undetermined state.
This material is offered 'as-is' and no warranty is given, either expressed or implied that it may be amusing. By downloading, modifying, copying, viewing, or otherwise using this material, you agree that neither the author of this material nor the owners or administrators of the site from which you might have solicited this material are liable for any breach of entertainment standards, damage or loss caused directly or indirectly by the use of this material, and that any such breaches, damage or loss is the sole responsibility of the person who downloads, modifies, copies, views, or uses this material, and blah blah blah...
All information submitted by private individuals is to the best of glitchsys.com's knowledge compliant in all respects with the year 2000, all subsequent years, and the requirements of the Public Health Acts, and any statutory modification or re-enactment therein in regard to the aforesaid glitchsys.com and every part thereof and with regard to all impositions whatsoever.... and if you are a lawyer gobshite who doesn't have a sense of humour who has actually got this far, you can stop reading now.